I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Randomize
