Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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