I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
