I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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