Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Randomize
