I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
