why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Drunk is not a location!
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Randomize
