If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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