We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Randomize
