I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Randomize
