No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
Your message has been received by an unknown user. Picture verification required.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
Randomize