that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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