so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
