I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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