Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
well most of my day revolves around power hour
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize
