She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
