i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Randomize