Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
