I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Randomize
