woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
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