Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
NoShamevember. You game?
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
