I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Come see our sink grown plant.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
