ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize