A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
id be glad to
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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