There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
I will be naked everywhere
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Randomize