Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
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