If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
you inspire me to be a worse person
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Randomize
