I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
