question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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