do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
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