I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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