I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Randomize
