I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
