Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
we should paint friendship bongs
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize