I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
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