I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
