How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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