question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
