Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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