I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
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