Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize
