She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Randomize
