Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Randomize
