So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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