Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Randomize
