Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Randomize