dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
