I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
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