You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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