She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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