Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
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